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Is cancer the best exit from life?

1/2/2015

11 Comments

 
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A US study has concluded that most types of cancer can be put down to bad luck rather than risk factors such as smoking.

EEEk! The word cancer is so feared that many people simply mouth 'C' rather than say the word which is linked with a life sentence. But maybe the condition shouldn't be so feared. In the UK, television commercials are running at the moment with a message that fewer people die from cancer than ever before. Well, my husband's diagnosis of multiple cancers in the prostate and abdominal area was given six months ago and he's still here beside me, albeit rake thin and in pain.

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en.wikipedia.org
But let's look further into the news.

The results of the study, published in the journal Science, showed two thirds of the cancer types analyzed were caused by chance mutations rather than lifestyle.

Okay, this doesn't mean you can pig out on cream cakes and turn your nose up at fruit and vegetables. Nor should you smoke or overindulge in alcohol. To do so would be tempting fate to the extreme.

In another story, a leading UK doctor and former editor of the prestigious British Medical Journal (BMJ) has claimed cancer is the best way to die. His reasons: a quick death is preferable than a lingering one due to dementia or organ failure. It also gives the affected person an opportunity to reflect on their life, say goodbye, and enjoy what pleases them most like listening to music.

Well, my experience has not been this way. On the plus side, my husband and I are closer than ever before, but this is balanced against financial worry and a feeling of helplessness.

He's receiving treatment but the result is in doubt. Many different doctors at our local surgery are dealing with him, as are various departments at the hospital. None work together. He has to explain what's happening each time he presents himself, and the stress is killing him. (We all know what stress can do to the body.) So far, nobody can work out why he's lost so much weight (about two and a half stone) but they say he's unlikely to regain the weight at the age of 75 years.

When he shouted with pain last night, I reached out and held his wrist to give comfort. What I felt might have belonged to a sickly child, and my fingers could have wrapped around the bone twice.

It's accepted that people die when they age. The body wears out and sometimes the mind retreats to earlier times. But this doesn't make it easier to bear when you rely on that person the way I do.

I'm sure you know someone who has died of cancer. Would you agree that it's a good way to die?
This post is linked with the Write Tribe: writetribe.com/write-tribe-pro-blogger-challenge/

11 Comments
Anna link
1/1/2015 06:40:32 pm

I can't imagine what you must be going through, and I definitely don't agree that it's a "good" way to die! I can't believe a doctor would actually say something like that! Also - a "quick" way? No way! A quick way is instant, not months of losing weight and fearing the worst!

Sending you lots of love

Anna x

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Sophie Bowns link
1/1/2015 08:17:57 pm

I'm so sorry, Francene.
-I just want to say that I think you're incredibly brave.
I think I'd rather die suddenly, although it might be worse for the people we leave behind...

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Janice Wald link
1/1/2015 08:46:17 pm

Hi Francene,
What a hard life you've led. I'm so sorry. I just saw The Theory of Everything. Steven Hawkings is still around after being given 2 years to live 70 years ago! I agree with Sophie.
Janice

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Dixie Theriault
1/2/2015 03:35:46 am

A quick way to die. Hardly. When you describe holding your husbands wrist and feeling how thin he has become, I can feel your own helplessness. Knowing that in spite of everything, you can't help him,and some small part of you is disappearing with him.

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Inderpreet link
1/2/2015 04:30:46 am

So sad to hear about your husbands cancer. I cannot imagine what you are going through. God bless. Hope the treatment helps and he is fine.

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Alana link
1/2/2015 05:52:30 am

I feel for you, Francene, and for your husband. I am sorry to have to say that I totally disagree with the person who said it was a good way to die. I watched my aunt die from pancreatic cancer, and a friend/co worker die from lung cancer. One of my co workers has terminal breast cancer. It is not a good way to die, for either the person or his/her loved ones. You are both in my thoughts again today, and I thank you for sharing your situation with us again. I am happy you are continuing to blog through your situation.

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Minette link
1/2/2015 08:50:30 am

Francene, I am so sorry to hear about your husband. I lost my stepmom to a very aggressive form of brain cancer several years ago. She was diagnosed and then gone a short three months later. It was so hard on all of us, but especially my dad. I have lots other friends as well and no, I don't think cancer is a good way to die - for either the person with cancer or their loved ones. Sending love and prayers to you.

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Jeanne Melanson link
1/2/2015 11:40:56 am

I can't believe a doctor would say that. Has he not been around people dying of cancer? I've worked with Hospice for many years, and cancer is not pretty. It's not easy, nor is it quick! Wow. I'm so sorry to learn that your husband is sick with cancer. I'm glad that it has brought you closer at least. Hopefully that is what will keep the memories pleasant when all is said and done. Peace to you.

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Vinitha link
2/8/2015 01:44:07 am

My father had cancer and he died within 3 months after the diagonosis. He had a heart condition which stopped us from going ahead with the treatment and the cancer had spread fro his kidneys to other organs. Even though he had to suffer for only few months, he had pretty bad days during that time. I don't think it was a good way to go.
I am sorry to hear about your husband and your tough time, Francene. I hope writing about it is bringing you the right aid, at least mentally.

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Gilly Maddison link
6/23/2015 09:43:52 pm

Where there is life there is hope. I hope with all my heart that your husband somehow gets through this. It must be horrible watching him go through this - so sorry for both of you. x

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Grant Leishman link
7/31/2015 12:09:26 pm

I've been fortunate so far to have not been touched by cancer too closely, but reading your blog it just makes me realise that behind the statistics, behind the ads....lie the real people. Thank you for reminding me of that and thank you for your courage to write about it. All power to you and more of us need to read and understand that "there but for the grace of God, go I"

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    Francene Stanley
    From England, I use news items in my novels which you can see below, all linked to an Amazon near you.

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