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 Discover why opposite personalities attract.

8/10/2015

9 Comments

 
 In the first academic study of its kind, researchers analysed complicated sequences in personality of the people who became best friends and found that their relationships thrived because of the differences in their personalities. A team at Keystone College, a private university in Pennsylvania say this only explains why people become best friends, not why marriage partners are compatible.

While the study shows close friendships thrive because a pair are different in their outlook, they found romance partners should be ‘largely similar’.

This made me consider how my own marriage works. My husband and I are alike in many ways; both first-born, both leaders, and both assertive. Hehe. That makes things interesting at times, but the challenge can be overcome. And so, what I'd considered to be a reason for disharmony in my marriage partnership, is the opposite.

I'll bet your mind is going that way too. But, let's look at the intricate personality traits.

PictureFriends - MorgueFile
 1) EASCO: extrovert, agreeable, emotionally stable, conscientious and open to change.

2) IDCNO: introverted, tough-minded, conscientious, neurotic and open to change.

3) IDUNT: introverted, tough-minded, restless, neurotic and traditional.

I fall under the first category. How about you?

Now to the study:

Researchers asked students to describe themselves and their best friends with a personality index based on listed traits. Finding: the person most likely to be chosen as a friend is an EASCO. Such extroverts find it easier to make friends quickly, but often need a more introverted friend to balance them out—one in the second or third category—quieter people who can tease, challenge and calm them.

The IDCNO type, described by the college’s team as the ‘quiet, anxious’ friend who ‘thinks about risks and is still willing to try it’, tend to choose a tougher type for a friend who helps them by ignoring problems.

The IDUNT will tend to choose as a best friend someone who is more agreeable and open than they are. Source: Daily Mail. 

As for best friends, I never had one because of constant shifting from place to place since childhood. I wish circumstances could change, but I like to think my 'cloud friends' replace close personal contact.

Do you have a best friend? Do these results ring true for you?


9 Comments
Vinitha link
8/9/2015 09:39:36 pm

I don't even know which category I would fit in because I am an introvert at first and turns into a dangerous extrovert giving the other person a totally different impression about me from the first time. I do have best friends, all of them are different in characters. :)

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K.Lee Banks link
8/10/2015 07:13:02 am

These are interesting categories - I've never heard of them, in spite of seeing numerous other personality tests and studies. I'm not sure I fit in any one of them; maybe a mix of #1 and #3.

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Amy link
8/10/2015 08:06:52 am

Francene, I was scarred as a young girl (not really) when my 6th grader teacher took surveys of all of us, asking us personal questions like who are best friends were. Then she announced in front of the class whose best friends were whose. The scarring occurred when I had several girls call me their best friend, but of course I only listed one of them. Awkward and so hurtful! So I have deferred from calling just one person my best friend ever since! Cause what if I have more than one person who might call me her best friend?? But I do have several very close girl friends and I'm very thankful for them.

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Alana link
8/10/2015 08:32:53 am

My best friend is so unlike me. We are opposites - I'm an introvert; she has tons of friends. I never participated in class. She did, always. She loves children (I..well, I'm not a child person, even though I love my son dearly). And even our health - I've mainly sailed through life up to now - she has had serious health problems all of her life, including two (unrelated) cancers.

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Dr. Steve R. Howell
8/10/2015 11:07:45 am

I'm glad you found our research interesting! I should point out that there are 32 possible personality types, formed from two possibilities on each of 5 personality dimensions: extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, emotional stability, and openness to experience. EASCO and IDUNT are just two of the 32. We'll have a free personality testing app coming soon!

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Francene
8/10/2015 04:57:27 pm

Your testing app sounds interesting, Steve. I hop you'll let me know when it is available.Each of us have so many differing personality traits.

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sacha link
8/10/2015 11:41:15 am

I totally agree with you. Is the opposite of my personality that attracts me.

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nabanita link
8/10/2015 04:28:26 pm

You know I think these studies are not entirely true but again they cannot be proved wrong too...My best friend and I are different yet similar in many ways...we share some common outlook while most of the time we are different...I think we have less things in common though as compared to me & my husband...So, I don't know..I guess it depends from person to person & relationship to relationship and can't be generalized much...

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Lata link
8/11/2015 09:34:57 pm

I think what makes for lOng lasting friendships is a common outlook and shared interests.

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    Francene Stanley
    From England, I use news items in my novels which you can see below, all linked to an Amazon near you.

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